Confession: Iām losing my sh*t this week
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Mom confession: A few days ago, I lost my sh*t (over a baseball belt) and SCREAMED at my child. Not just yelled at him, but legit screamed, crazy person style, right in his face as I grabbed him by the shoulders.
If I’m being 100% honest, I felt myself holding back the urge to physically hurt him. It’s hard to admit that. But it’s the truth. I was filled with rage. He did nothing wrong, but I had a split second moment of wanting to quick release the pressure cooker. Luckily I was able to hit pause and re-ground myself.
As we drove to the baseball game with the ill-fitting belt situation sorta solved, I took a few deep breaths and apologized to him for my reaction. My emotionally-intelligent six-year-old’s kind, forgiving, and reassuring response is what made me realize I needed to share this experience.
I needed to forgive myself for that moment and normalize that these experiences happen to us all!
I can’t count the number of times I’ve spoken (in workshops, speaking engagements, and in conversations with clients) about the idea that there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. And what matters isn’t whether you lose your cool, but how you use those moments as opportunities to repair and course correct.
It dawned on me - Often I hold myself to an unrealistic standard in motherhood. Because I’m a therapist, because I teach things like emotion regulation, healthy communication, and boundary setting…because I have an entire course devoted to implementing these things in motherhood…I somehow adopted the belief that I should be protected against my own mom-meltdown moments.
But guess what - I’m human! And I have my “sh*tty-mom moments,” too.
I know that it doesn't make me a bad mom, and it doesn’t make me a fraud as a therapist either.
There’s so many reasons why I was dysregulated leading up to & in that moment - Recognizing the dysregulation is key. Now that I’ve owned the dysregulated state, I can move on to practicing what I preach in order to reground and feel more calm, confident, and in-control.
Want to know more about the strategies I’m referring to? Check out my Empowered Motherhood course here.